02 June 2018

My Experience With Sleeping Paralysis Phenomenon

This was a very shocking moment. I'm intentionally not saying that it was frightening or scary because it wasn't.

Good Morning, Sun!

It happens too frequently and too often that I happen to go to bed when it gets light outside and I really hate it. Regardless of that, I think there's no reason to trying to stay up it doesn't feel right so of course, I lie down into my bed, prepared to go to sleep. Occasionally depending on my mood, I try the energy practice I talked about in the My Hero Akademia post and sometimes I just fall asleep. It often happens that I hear weird noises but I either think it's just something explainable or my imagination. That's most often the case, not always though.

This Was Unexpected...

I didn't experience this before though, it's the first time for me. I don't know if I slept already but I assume I already drifted off, regardless I was awoken by a weird noise. It was like something holding its breath and breathing out near my ear. As a reaction to this noise, I immediately open my eyes widely. Well, what do you expect, we're driven by curiosity, obviously, and there I saw it. It was a black figure leaning towards my bed with its hands outstretched.

How I Reacted

Now, of course, many would've panicked. This is not how I reacted though. I immediately jumped to the conclusion that I was in sleeping paralysis, however, my body did not feel stiff, quite the contrary I was even able to look away closing my eyes from the shock. I mean if you open your eyes and something is too near to you, of course, you want to get the distance. Moving from a lying position is a bit tough though so it was only my head that moved, besides my consciousness or unconsciousness was already determined it was something like sleeping paralysis. After a short moment of having my body calm down, I opened my eyes again and it was gone.

Recall

The way I felt after seeing it, the way my body was pounding and my heart raced, I recall this feeling. I've felt it before. Every time I have such an experience of seeing something like that is bad, regardless of how it looks like. Spider web, shadow person, orb, vortex, whatever it is, the immediate reaction from my body is the same and afterward, it's always gone.

Final Thoughts

As a wizard I've been training myself already to get rid of any feelings of fear, these are toxic for yourself. I remember writing a post about fending off demons where I mention it that fear is a bad thing. I assume my unconsciousness is not ready yet, as I'm linking these symptoms (heart racing, throbbing body) that are initiated by the sight of something unfamiliar to fear and even though I know I'm not scared I still feel them. Then again it's the same with performing a presentation. Even if I'm 100% ready and prepared for it and I don't have any doubts my body still can't be calm.

Regardless I still think I handled the situation as good as I could, I just wish I would be able to stay unconsciously calm to better understand the situation and maybe even ask or interact with it?
For science, you know.

For the science of magic, spirituality and the psyche.

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I'm a junior game developer and software developer and I created this blog to share my ideas, thoughts and whatever I'm working on or doing.